Rosie and the Pussycats?

O'Donnell on vocals (and lyrics, obvi), Jodie on guitar, and Zac on drums. Pink would be the opening act.

(Source)

Star Jones Also Reveals That David Beckham is Attractive and Clay Aiken Gay

After being fired from The View and enduring Rosie O'Donnell's constant taunting, Star Jones has finally decided to set the record straight about her drastic weight loss, shocking us all by revealing that she did, in fact, resort to gastric-bypass surgery.

Like any attorney, Star says she was ''intentionally evasive'' when people asked how she'd dropped 160 pounds in three years. She weighed 307 pounds at her heaviest. This amazing woman writes about her weight loss in a first-person essay in the September issue of Glamour.

THIS IS ALL WE GET?? Lindsay gets arrested for DUI and coke possession and Paris loses and regains her inheritance in four hours. What is Star Jones bringing to the entertainment table? It was clear she had gastric bypass; the only way to lose so much weight is with drastic surgery or by puking until both Olsen twins come out your mouth. If this is Star's way of getting us to watch her show on Court TV (it exists), she's failed.

We could reconsider if Big Gay Al (her husband) comes out on her show.

(FYI: Tomorrow, the gals on The View will announce who's replacing Rosie and Star for good.)

Back to Paula.

The More Things Change...

Yeah, we're threading these together.

Ang Lee is back, but calm down, homos - it's not one of those movies again. Though the name of the film is "Lust, Caution."



Meanwhile, Donald Trump has invited Rosie to appear on a celebrity edition of The Apprentice.

Last and certainly least, Britney (above) just bought a puppy for $3,000. She's also auditioning for the inevitable award-winning roles of "Drunken Drag Queen Version of Natalie Portman in 'Closer'" *and* "Long-Lost Latina Cousin on the Street Corner" in the movie adaptation of our lives. Respect.

Neuter THIS

Las Latinas have been thinking about this important issue for a long time now, and after Rosie's decision to decline the offer, we've decided to endorse Reginald VelJohnson as new host of The Price Is Right.

NBC is Our Ro Pusher

"NBC's new programming chief Ben Silverman is telling friends he will do anything to get Rosie O'Donnell onto the network, and not just in daytime. Silverman is talking to O'Donnell about hosting a prime-time game show he has up his sleeve as well as a daytime hour a la The View."

Politics of Friendship

Rosie vs. Elisabeth Hasselbeck. This fight takes the cake.

Rosie and Hasselcrack Fight!
Uploaded by TheDlisted

RoRo Time!

We haven't posted any Ro q's in quite some time, so we've missed some superb responses. Time to get back on track. Ro has decided to stop much of her posting about the war, but that isn't stopping ppl from calling her out on her crazy! First: some sage wisdom.

I'd Like to Give Bill O'Reilly a Taste of My KNUCKLE SANDWICH!

Here it is! Rosie's greatest posts of the week. This week: "Dyke has a Y, You Terrorist! Edition."

Rosie's Questions of the Week!

We know that this is the moment you have all been awaiting...our weekly rundown of Rosie's classic questions from this week. Since Ro usually answers several dozen q's a day, we've conveniently culled the greatest of those posts for your reading pleasure. Rosie's answers are far greater than any commentary we could provide, although we will say this: Hey Todd -- sad, yes, but...wtf?
Here we go:

When Crazy Bitches, Planets Collide

OMG, so this is the scoop:

Dina Lohan, LL's "mother," was scheduled to appear on Daytime Emmy-nominated The View this Thursday, more likely than not to confuse Joy Behar with Bette Midler and to finger Rosie's armpit (we vote for the one on the left). Unfortunately, her appearance was cancelled, *allegedly* due to Rosie's hating Dina's parenting skills, look, influence, and overall idiocy. (To wit: "As for her own nightlife activities, [Dina]'s unapologetic: 'If you can button it and clip it when you're in your 40s, you're going out.'" We say: hott motto.)

Needless to say, we're pissed-off sluts right now. What are we going to TiVo instead? Martha??? Since when does Rosie actively sabotage our You Tube dependency? So selfish. Maybe we'll stab someone while we hang upside down.

Oh, and if this leads to our precious Lindsay having to make a Japanese commercial, DIOS HELP YOU ALL.

One Ball Is Enuf

Rosie's been getting a lot of attention lately for her strong views, but not everyone realizes that she also has a daily q&a with her fans. This q&a is undoubtedly the greatest part of Rosie's blog, and she answers dozens of questions per day. So, for our readers who may not have the time to sort through a backlog of questions, las Latinas have helpfully culled the greatest questions of the week. Rosie's answers are just below the block quote questions.

john writes:

Keep up your trash talk about Bush and your ridiculous conspiracy theory about his implied involvement in 9/11. You really are a mess! Get some help!… and some talent while your at it.

u r named after a bathroom

Mandy writes:

I’m STILL holding my breath Rosie, because you STILL have not said hello to me! If i explode then what??? Luv ya!

oh mandy

ONTD writes:

Word on the street is that you farted. Big time.

Any comment on this development?

toot

justin writes:

RO~
Had surgery yesterday.
they removed my testicle which had a tumor on it.

CANT WAIT for the View today. You make my day, everyday..

I’m GLAD your on this earth… you qre inspiration 2 me

hang in there justin
one ball is enuf
get well

violet writes:

“A 20 YR CIA AGENT - NOC…”

What is NOC?

thanks, luv ya RO!

Non-official cover is contrasted with official cover, where an agent assumes a position at a seemingly benign department of their government, such as the diplomatic service. If caught, agents under non-official cover are usually trained to deny any connection with their government, and do not have many of the protections offered to (for example) accredited diplomats who are caught spying.

* * * *

Oh Ro, don't play! You didn't write that last answer. Just for that, we're posting this *amazing* video of you on the View the other day recreating the most infamous Nip/Tuck scene of all infamous Nip/Tuck scenes. It's hott, although Julian needs to take off the hat.

News That Blogger Forcefully Makes Fit

First, the Daytime Emmy Noms came out today, and only one category really matters:

Outstanding Talk Show Host

DR. PHIL * SYN
DR. PHIL MCGRAW, HOST

THE ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW * SYN
ELLEN DEGENERES, HOST

RACHAEL RAY * SYN
RACHAEL RAY, HOST

SOAP TALK * SOAPNET
LISA RINNA, HOST
TY TREADWAY, HOST

THE TYRA BANKS SHOW * SYN
TYRA BANKS, HOST

THE VIEW * ABC
BARBARA WALTERS, CO-HOST
ROSIE O'DONNELL, CO-HOST
JOY BEHAR, CO-HOST
ELISABETH HASSELBECK, CO-HOST

Tyra's War on Fat (and Sanity) deserves its own special Emmy, but we all know The View has to win this award. Even Donald Trump knows it.

Meanwhile, we're happy to report that Britney - allegedly - is sufficiently healthy and competent to start a new romance with a great new man. Seriously, this one has so much potential. (Was Robbie Williams unavailable?)

Finally. Welcome back, Daddy Lohan! No, silly, we don't mean Bruce Willis.